Get Yourself a “Go-To” Guy
All my life I remember being surrounded by “guys.” You know--men who could do anything, build anything, fix anything. I lived and still live in total awe of these men. My father was a wood craftsman and builder. He could restore any piece of furniture, no matter how mangy it looked. One of my best friends had a father who was a Seabee* and he could build anything. My husband? He did it all. He worked on cars, trucks, steam engines (yes, you read that right—steam locomotives), on wood, metals, plumbing, AC stuff, electrical challenges and so on. When he was about 13 he told his mother their house should have copper pipes for the plumbing, and asked to re-plumb the whole house. She agreed and they were told many years later, even after they had sold the house, the pipes were working beautifully. I was never more impressed with him, than when he took out a toilet in our house to replace it with a new one. I remember walking in while he was working— old toilet to the side, new one being taken out of the box. Any efforts in the past to impress me paled beside the toilet removal.
I have known many of these guys. But, they don’t seem to appear in the great numbers that I saw in the past. Oh, I know some are out there, but I just don’t meet up with them. After all, someone has to be building homes, and fixing cars, etc.
Now when my husband died, I lost my “go to guy,” lost his encyclopedic knowledge of all things beyond my ken, lost someone I could run to in all manner of emergencies.
But a new guy emerged to help me. My good girlfriend of 67 years has a husband who is just such a guy’s guy. He is retired while she is not yet, and she was kind enough to share him and his knowledge. He helped me by listening to me cry over the phone right after my husband died. And he was there for advice when something started smoking, or wouldn’t start, or was just plain perplexing me. He had this same magic encyclopedia in his head—he knows everything worth knowing about engines, saws, tires, batteries, plumbing . . . you get the picture. So, now he has become my “go to guy.” Like my girlfriend he has been kind enough to abide me and counsel me through the everyday hiccups of things that need attention or repair.
Once I get the diagnosis, I have another such guy in the family. My son-in-law is one of the magicians who builds, repairs, etc. My daughter even claims that is part of why she married him. She was raised by a guy who could fix things and could not imagine life without a clone of her father in that area.
Do not think however, that I can’t do anything. Youtube is a wonderful place, and it was there I learned to replace my toilet handle. (The guy at Home Depot was real impressed with me for even attempting this.) And I have learned to replace the tail light bulbs for my car by reading the manual. BUT, when you’re down to the wire, girls, when it’s fourth down and you need a reliable decision or counsel, I say get yourself a “go-to” guy—by all means.
Jackie, this one is for you and the unflagging support and friendship of you and your wife.
*More about the Seabees (from Wikipedia): “United States Naval Construction Battalions, better known as the Seabees, form the Naval Construction Force (NCF) of the United States Navy. Their nickname is a heterograph of the first initials "C.B." from the words Construction Battalion.
Their Motto:
Construimus, Batuimus"
We build. We fight"
"CAN DO"
“The difficult we do now, the impossible takes a little longer"