"Autumn...the year's last, loveliest smile."
William Cullent Bryant
Autumnal Musing
I had dug it out of the back of my jewelry collection—I had completely forgotten that I had ordered the bracelet. It was a brown leather creation consisting of several “strands” of leather, two braided and two or three plain ones. I must have bought it about the time I got really serious about working on my ANCESTRY family tree. Indeed, it bore a golden tree in its middle—the tree of life, so to speak.
I had been looking for bracelets that looked like fall, for here in Georgia we are beginning to get those “fall vibes.” Oh, we’re not officially there yet according to weather prognosticators and makers of calendars—but if one is attuned to nature, it can be felt and faintly seen. The leaves are still mostly green, but there is a smattering here and there of a lonely yellow leaf that makes its way down. It and other yellow and mottled ones are the harbingers of fall. And a true Georgian can feel it “in the air.” Now don’t misunderstand, the temps are still high and one can still work up beads of sweat. But ever so occasionally, there is what feels like a breeze—a wafting air current that seems to come from some cool, faraway place. But you know what it is, it is fall announcing itself with its haunting ways.
Fall, over time has become my favorite season. I have always thought that when we are young and life is busy, there is force and heat as we move along--like spring and summer. But as I got older I saw fall as a reflection of myself, things seemed more muted, a little slower and cooler, like fall and winter.
And so a few days ago I started easing my way into my fall attire, wearing some golds and greens and browns to get myself ready for fall. Hence the search for the the brown bracelet.
I dressed and then starting putting on the jewelry that would bespeak fall. I put on my rings and pin and then reached for the bracelet. It was one that had a chain and a hook and I could NOT get it hooked. The more I tried the more frustrated I became, bordering on mad.
And I suddenly knew what was bothering me—I had no one to turn to who could lend a hand and gently hook this piece together so I could be on my way to church. Just as suddenly I was swept with sadness and felt my eyes start to tear up. My other half was missing. He had been officially gone a decade now since August 10th, but I had made my way madly through summer, keeping busy with trying to get an early start on fall cleaning.
But this bracelet was a hurtful reminder of my loss. There was no one to hook my bracelet, drink coffee with, talk about our little family, watch the same TV shows, crab about the same things in politics. There was no one to be the Batman to my Robin as we jumped into our car and ran the various errands or went on that occasional “adventure” like taking off to a little Georgia town for a visit. No one to “holler for” when I was in trouble, no one to laugh at me when I cried at sappy movies, no one to eat meals with, no one to kiss goodbye . . . no one.
I cursed the bracelet for reminding me of that loss, of the man that I had loved heart and soul who was gone.
Thank goodness I was on the way to church. The sun was shining as I made my way to the place where I could sit and hear God’s word. Indeed as I drove I started that list of things one is always thankful FOR—LIFE, good health, our children, friends, pets, good neighbors, the good guys in this world, the fact that I can go and worship. I became thankful for all these things just as suddenly as I felt what was missing. It was then that I felt he was still with me in some way, my heart could take it, I could bounce back because I could remember that love he and I had shared and how it had blessed my life.
============Some Fall Quotes For You:
George Eliot
"Is not this a true autumn day? Just the still melancholy that I love—that makes life and nature harmonize."
Unknown
“Autumn is the season to find contentment at home by paying attention to what we already have.”
Ann Drake
"I can smell autumn dancing in the breeze. The sweet chill of pumpkin, and crisp sunburnt leaves."
John Donne
"No spring nor summer beauty hath such grace as I have seen in one autumnal face."
George Eliot
"Delicious autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the Earth seeking the successive autumns."
Lauren DeStefano
"Fall has always been my favorite season. The time when everything bursts with its last beauty, as if nature had been saving up all year for the grand finale." –
"If a year was tucked inside of a clock, then autumn would be the magic hour." – Victoria Erickson
"Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall." – F. Scott Fitzgerald